home.

so tonight i'm going "home" i really do not want to. however, my little cousin nickolas is going to be there. i love him dearly and miss him soooo much. you see he has been my boy since the moment i held him in my arms. i definitely fell in love.

nickolas is almost two years old now & i've been watching him grow from the time he was four days old.

he had his first sleepover at my house when he was a week old. that night i didn't sleep at all because i kept thinking i heard him whimper. lol. my mom was like "amanda you look just as terrified as a new mother." i remembered that making me laugh a lot. :]

for over a month this summer i was told that i was not allowed to see him because i "did not deserve it" but they eventually saw that it harmed him just as much as it killed me. and soon he stayed over again. i hate being home, but seeing nickolas is worth all the hassle, all the stress and even all their harsh words and such. because he is the one person who means the most to me in this world...

now that i am finished ranting about this it's time to head out. sooooo peaccceeeeeee.